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Queer eye for the queer guy

 
 
Querelle
17:18 / 21.08.03
As much as I dislike labels and stereotypes, I have to admit that I seem to have been passed over when the queerfairy was granting design/fashion sense. I just have no sense of visual design whatsoever.

I was recently reminded of this when I moved into my new apartment, especially my bedroom. I stand there and try to visualize different arrangements, but nothing seems to be an improvement over where I have things now. I have framed pictures sitting in a pile wailing for me to put them up, but I have no idea where to start. Searching the internet didn't help much, unless you consider Martha Stewert-eske chochka "design". Any tips (besides IKEA)?
 
 
Tryphena Absent
21:12 / 21.08.03
It's all about personal taste. Experiment a little. When you're putting things on the wall think about whether you prefer space or clutter. I'm a bit minimalistic in my preferences- I don't like pictures to be crowded together but it can look good if you take some time over it. You can never go wrong if you put a picture on a wall pretty centrally.

With furniture the size of the room is fundamental. If it's a big room then you can bring the bed out from the wall but if it's smaller than it's a good idea to have the bed lengthwise along a wall. It's good to have some space on the floor but you don't want to create a great big empty vacuum.

Really the best thing is to talk about how to arrange it with someone who does have an eye for these things and can see the room. There are plenty of people out there who are mad for interior design and you probably know one!
 
 
Linus Dunce
00:11 / 22.08.03
Oh, I don't know, I'm straight. :-) But I'd take a long hard look at your pictures. It sounds to me like you want a new start, maybe some new content that contrasts with the colour or whatever of your new rooms. As for the form of the things, check out the "weight" of each one. Thick frames and/or big pictures should maybe go on the longer walls towards the centre or, if to one side, balanced against a close group of smaller pictures. And try and line up the centre of the compositions (i.e. the centre of gravity or where your eye falls rather than the dimensions in inches) over the whole room. But that's just me.
 
 
Linus Dunce
00:17 / 22.08.03
PS: If you have thick frames on small pictures, shame on you. It's just not right.
 
 
Querelle
01:42 / 22.08.03
If I could paint the walls of my apartment it would be much cooler, especially dark colors, but I'm pretty much stuck with this bland off-white standard issue apartment paint. My bedroom is kinda narrow, roughly 14 ft x 8 ft (that's 4 x 2.5 meters for you metrically inclined), and I have a full size bed. I had it in the corner but it didn't look quite right and I need a corner for my floor lamp. And of course, there are pipes coming down in two corners, and a big hunk of steel (steam furnace) in the other corner. But yeah, I need to get one of my more fashion conscious friends over here immediately. I do have some cool ideas for lighting, but it's the art of object placement that i'm clueless about.

If I can get my landlord to let me paint, that would be ace. I don't anticipate him ever coming around to fix anything anyway, so I should just say fuck it and paint.

Ah, the joys of student housing. (off campus, thank god).
 
 
netbanshee
04:03 / 22.08.03
Ikea isn't really gonna be thrown in as an option if your room wants to be in true form (and not falling apart in two years), but their lighting is always a great way to go. Can call lots of focus to parts of the room and give it an interesting atmosphere. Maybe mixing a piece of furniture from their isn't a bad idea, just don't rely on them.
I'm also a bit minimal, so I prefer a good, old chair or two (ebay auctions are good for old side chairs, etc.), with a picture or two from friends (all sizes but big is good), a side table or two and lots of space. I'm a designer so the whole less is more thing applies a bit personally... don't know if it's you but it's what I got.
 
 
Tryphena Absent
08:05 / 22.08.03
Have you thought about hanging something off the pipes? I used to wrap ribbons around mine but you might not be a ribbon kinda soul but it's not a bad idea to try and make a feature of them.
 
 
Goodness Gracious Meme
12:38 / 29.08.03
agreed, you're probably not going to be able to hide 'em. polishing pipes and chucking a couple of spotlights over them can look quite cool. use em as picture rails/mounting space? (you can hang/stick stuff to em, maybe?)

If yr stuck with a bland colour wall then use it as a good background colour for hanging. Get some really really strong colours up if that's yr thing, via pictures/ hangings (this is dead easy, get a large bit of fabric you like and top and tail with poster hangers)
 
 
Ganesh
20:20 / 04.09.03
Plants. Big, fuck-off plants, as leafy and sprawling as the space will reasonably allow. Flowering ones on windowsills, orchids and bromeliads in the bathroom (they appreciate the moisture), aspidistra in the dark hallway.

Rooms seem more alive with green stuff in.
 
 
Mourne Kransky
17:48 / 08.09.03
I too have heard rumours that sexual orientation is linked to design panache.

As with all such research, we're simply talking percentages here. Therefore, although you and I may lack the blessing of the queerfairy, chances are we could go down to the gay bar, gay bar, gay bar and pick up almost any other punter there, take him home and set him to decorating for us, with the option of a good shag after (but that may be harder to select for).
 
 
The Strobe
12:03 / 09.09.03
Off-white is easy to disguise with paintings, hangings, and lighting. And the thing with lighting is sometimes you can just use light itself to fill space and gaps on walls, rather than always having to have it shining on things. A nice uplighter in a corner can often mean you don't need to hang anything on the vertex walls near the corner; the light is enough of a decoration when dark, and when light, the other hangings (for example) in the room will draw the eye. So go careful on the lighting - too much directional light interfering with each other (spots, uplighters) could get difficult and too much diffuse stuff all over the place (ceiling lights) could be harder to control wrt what you want to hang on the walls. You can get some wonderfully cheap and stylish lamps and lights if you look around - I have a superb 6ft upligher, plain black with a "frosted" plastic bowl at the top, cost me a tenner and I'm never getting rid of it. Puts light where it doesn't naturally reach, brings out the shape of the room, casts nice shadows. And you can experiment, say, with coloured gels over lights to tint them if you really want (though if you do, use proper gels from a theatrical lighting supplier - though they look like cellophane, they withstand ludicrously hot temperatures, which sweet wrappers don't really).

That's what I'd say; I'm no interior design nor lighting expert but I have a rough idea of what might work. I can visualise it, certainly. So I hope the musings of this Straight Eye are of some help...
 
 
Rawk'n'Roll
09:03 / 10.09.03
Simple cure-all for off-white/magnolia walls.

Paint it pure white.

The landlord will never know, you'll have a bright fresh looking room with which ANY colour or design will work and if you have flat walls they'll look immediately retro-cool minimalist or if you have flock walls the flock effect will seem less obvious.


Alternatively blow all your hard earned cash down Laura Ashley... its due for a revival ANY day now.
 
  
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