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Underground > Creation >

Barbelith Personality Quiz

22:28 / 04.07.03

Ellis (sorry, dude, to drag your good name into this) and I recently started work on an online quiz entitled 'What sort of Barbelither Are You?' However, due to Ellis' limited net access atm, and my general lack of inventiveness, it's not getting very far... so, I thought I would throw the creation of this redundant/meta/up-it's-own-arse little quiz open to anyone that cares to play.

Not sure how well this will work, because the creation of a decent online quiz is such a sprawling affair even in the confines of a single mind...but I thought we could bash out questions here, and then I'd collate and publish them on Quizilla. NB: These things are *supposed* to be insulting little caricatures, so don't hurt me, or each other. Please.

Sketchy ideas for results:

Troll
You just love to make trouble - you're not happy unless the board revolves around you and your transgressions.

Theory Bitch
You know what you are. I'm not even going to try to define you here, because you might give me a nasty (but erudite) verbal slapping for my trouble.

Lurker
You watch the board unfold like a pretty, pretty flower. One of those foul-smelling ones.

Know-it-All
You have to sit on your hands to stop yourself from snipping and sniping at everyone who doesn't make the grade. Give up, give in, and enjoy yourself at others' expense - you know you want to.

Authority
The parent figures of the board...?

Fanboy/girl/other

Magician

Question 1?
Barbe-meets are...

A good place to show off my new plank ----> Troll
A good place to show off my undeniable superiority ----> Know-it-all
A good place to show off my lovely lovely brain ----> Theory Bitch
A good place to show off my new comics ----> Fanboy
How the hell would I know, bucko? ----> Lurker

23:03 / 04.07.03

The troll would not exist without the bridge.

The bridge is YOU.

YA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SLAYER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

23:05 / 04.07.03

METALLICA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PANTERA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

SFDGSFDGSDFGSFDGSFDGSDGRGDF????????????????????

!
!
!
!
!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

23:43 / 04.07.03

Smartass
You don't have much to say that isn't some kind of joke, pun, or put-down. Every once in a while your zingers are kind of relavent and amusing but that's not really a priority for you.

Barbemeets are...

right next to the dairy aisle. ----> Smartass.

Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo

03:45 / 05.07.03

Magickian

Barbemeets are...

...a new way to charge a sigil.

05:03 / 05.07.03

Huggler You're there for everyone. You're ready to hand out that virtual chickensoup then stand back and wait for someone to notice just how nice you are. Huggles to you.

Whisky Priestess

13:44 / 07.07.03

Firestarter

There's nothing you like better than to start a controversial thread, or add controversially to an existing one, or simply take the piss out of people who seem to be taking the whole thing too seriously. You don't much care what the fight's about, as you have no real convictions either way, but you sure do love to see the fur fly.

Barbemeets are ... a good place to sound out people's bugbears for future use.

13:52 / 07.07.03

Question 2:

You find yourself faced with being laid off from work/expelled from school/kicked out of your house.

You log onto the board and...

* Randomly insult people until someone asks what's wrong. troll

* Head right to the Magick to get someone to charge your new job-/school-/house-finding sigil. magician

* Start a new thread on power relations and the exploitation of workers/students/tenants. theory bitch

* Find an old or ongoing discussion about a related topic and sidetrack it into a debate over power relations and exploitation. Bonus points for drawing out a member who's in management/a professor/a landowner! know-it-all

* Make a dry post in the Conversation asking if anyone has any information about jobs/academic programs/places for rent.authority

* Make a damp, ranty post in the Conversation. Or possibly have a friend do it for you. huggler

* Almost start a thread about it in the Conversation, but can't quite bring yourself to hit the "post new topic" button. lurker

* Post a message asking for assassins or other operatives to help you "neutralize" the agents of the dark order responsible for your troubles. fanboy.girl.other

* Don't mention a thing unless you can make it sound funny. smartass

18:02 / 07.07.03

Question 3:

Another poster is getting on your nerves. To deal with your frustration and blinding headaches, you:

A) keep an eye out for their posts and insult and abuse them, regardless of the context, for at least six weeks. troll

B) develop a text-based ritual with a non-concentual cognitive trigger accessing minor thoughtforms in the Barbelith egregore to refocus their energies in a less irritating direction. magician

C) Start a new thread on power relations and the psychology of irritation. theory bitch

D) find a thread where the offending party makes some factual or precedural error and hound them to death about it. know-it-all

E) ignore them till they go away. authority

F) PM an apology and explain your side of the conflict. Only by talking through a conflict can we learn how to avoid them in the future. Huggler

G) Log off and go play some Grand Theft Auto. lurker

H) Take comfort in the fact that the offending party obviously knows fuck-all about the industry politics during Kirby's stint w/Marvel and hence does not fully appreciate the irony of Marvel Team-up #47. fanboygirlother

I) Do nothing unless you can come up with an insulting pun on the offending party's user name. smartass

J) infuriate the offending party by subtley mocking them in the barbequotes/Arrgh!Fuck!/photos thread. If they're half as smart as they think they are, they'll catch the reference and overreact, just as you planned, making you look like the calm, reasonable one in the resulting Policy thread/moderator PMs. firestarter

Solitaire Rose as Tom Servo

18:31 / 07.07.03

I think a couple of new catagories could be:

Confused X-Men fan (who foudn the board looking for information about Grant Morrison).

Comics Geek (who ONLY particiaptes in the comics forum and wonders why we don't talk about ROM: Spaceknight and Secret Wars as much as the do on Newsarama)

Tech-head

Barbe-Elder: Has been here since before YOU and wants to remidn you that things were much better before all the re-boots.

19:27 / 07.07.03

"Barbe-Elite: Has been here since before YOU and wants to remidn you that things were much better before all the re-boots."

Yeah I was going to mention something like that one too. Barb-Elder; good name.

Barb-Veteran: Smattering your conversation with barbspeak you relish freakin' the newbies with tales of asscandleling and facemounting all in the quest for real ultimate power."

19:39 / 07.07.03

Barbeveteran: Barbemeets are:

A prelude to entering Selfawaria.

19:44 / 07.07.03

Isn't a firestarter the same thing as a smartass or a troll?

Isn't a veteran the same thing as an authority?

(Obviously not exactly, but for quiz purposes....)

20:43 / 07.07.03

Spoken like a true know-it-all, grant. ;P

21:17 / 07.07.03

Perhaps we could work on amalgamating some of the descriptions? Bearing in mind that for each question, there should really be one answer to cover every result, so - we don't want too many possible results.

I'm inputting the questions and answers so far into Quizilla... Is everyone cool with that?

21:43 / 07.07.03

Barbe-Elite/Barbe-Veteran seems to be kind of a category that can encompass various other categories, particularly (to my mind) Know-it-all and Authority. There are Barbe-Veterans from all walks of caricature-hood...

08:24 / 08.07.03

Question, uh, four? Bits of it, anyway...will be less LotR-centric eventually, I expect.

The fictional characters with whom you most identify...

are generally large, pastel-coloured and enjoy smushing hobbits and juvenile wizards with their trusty wooden clubs. A noble vocation indeed. -> troll

like to wear a lot of white and enjoy wrestling monsters with fiery whips, even outside the confines of the local SM club -> magician

spend the first book in the trilogy following at a distance, rarely noticed by others, and wondering why no one seems to want to carry *them* up any mountains ->lurker

11:32 / 08.07.03

Buddy, from Charles In Charge. Smartass

Yes, Buddy is my favorite fictional character, mostly because of the incident with the toilet plunger. Did you know that the actor who played Buddy now produces and stars in a series of movies about a superhero called Bible Man?

Whisky Priestess

15:10 / 08.07.03

.... are innocent-seeming scheming stirrers, like Becky Sharp from Vanity Fair or a (subtler) Lisa from Big Brother. How you admire their ability to be the calm eye of the shitstorm!

Whisky Priestess

15:12 / 08.07.03

that last one was a firestarter, (or smartass or troll) obviously