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Is it possible for everyone on Earth to be nice to each other?

 
 
Jack Denfeld
13:18 / 27.04.03
There was a topic in Conversation about selfishness. I offered that if you had a large pizza, and I was hungry, and you didn't let me have a slice, that was a bad thing. But would the "treat others the way you would like to be treated" philosophy work? I mean, would everyone on Earth acting in this manner.....would it break something in the societal mechanism that would cause everything to go horribly wrong? I'm not getting any specific negatives in my head, but my gut is telling me there is something very wrong about everyone being nice. Or is that just a kind of a built in negative attitude?
 
 
Olulabelle
14:26 / 27.04.03
If you consider Art and how much of the work produced is borne out of anger, or sadness or misery, do you think that it’s fair to say that if those emotions and mind-states were no longer attainable less and less Art would be produced? No more painting, no more bleak film, no more dark writing. It all sounds a bit Stepford Wives, and has the potential to make the world a very dull place to be. Now, I have no wish to cite Noel Gallagher as an artist, but he did make an interesting comment on song writing, in which he said (something along the lines of) When you are poor and have no job, and life is hard it’s very easy to write beautiful songs, but when you have everything you want, and you’re happy and rich and successful, what have you got left to write about?

If you think about relationships and the clichés that surround them, for example ‘women like bastards’ and the recognised trait amongst women not to be able to maintain relationships with men who are ‘too nice,’ you can see that this suggests the traits related to being ‘not nice’ appear to have a fundamental part to play in the human characteristics we all value. I’m not saying they’re the most important, but they do seem to make up a great deal of what we are and how we behave. Indeed personally the people who I like best are the ones who have a darker streak to them.

So I’m not sure if I’m making myself clear here, but what I’m trying to say is that I don’t think it would cause everything to go horribly wrong, but I do think it would make being alive somewhat boring. I don’t think that’s a negative attitude, it’s perhaps just awareness that being nice isn’t necessarily the most stimulating way of life.

Of course, having said that, if everyone went around being nice to each other all the time, we’d have no war and no poverty, and no murder or rape or violence, or abuse or starvation, because everyone would be looking out for each other.

But if you think about mini-societies where the idealism of everyone treating each other the way they would like to be treated is outplayed, for example in Communes, you find that although the theory is fine in principle, people are incapable of consistently following it. In Christianity niceness is considered to be the way a good Christian should act, (Love thy neighbour) yet look how many deaths the religion is responsible for.

So I don't think it is possible for us all to be nice to each other, all the time, all over the world, because at the very least there would be people who'd find the whole niceness thing completely stultifying, and would possibly rebell against it.
 
 
Leap
15:57 / 27.04.03
Do you want to know if everyone who we would consider human (any ideas on the description for that anyone?!!!) would be able to do so (socios and pshychos included), or simply whether the majority of folks can (and as such should be accepted as the norm on the grounds of it being something the vast majority of us would do)?

Sorry if that seems a bit abstract, it has been one of those day
 
 
Ganesh
18:38 / 27.04.03
It's possible, but only if they all receive EDUCATION.
 
 
Leap
19:14 / 27.04.03
Oh you are so funny Ganesh ho ho ho look you are so funny I just cannot help laughing ho ho ho

So I am an optimist who believes that the vast majority of humankind are actually able to get along in a non-abusive manner if actually taught how and why such a world is better (our common nature is to live in a world where privacy and personal involvement have primacy over supervision and professionalised delegation and where inclusive egalitarianism and vigilance in our lives should be our foundation rather than elitism and policing – to deny this is to deny our meaning in life and to also (incidentally!!!!) embrace a cultural paradigm that will lead us to either the ecological and social hells of dystopian chaos or a “brave new world”, as opposed to relying primarily on enforcement, by an elite-few, to shape the world.

Sue me.
 
 
Ganesh
19:30 / 27.04.03
Be as optimistic as you like - just define EDUCATION while you're about it. Do it in my new thread, if you like.
 
 
Lurid Archive
09:41 / 28.04.03
I continue to find it fascinating the way that leap presents his own values as self evident, requiring a few modest suggestions in order that they be accepted by all. It is even more interesting to see this continue in the face of disagreement. "Why won't anyone listent to me? Everyone accepts this!"

Which is a roundabout way of saying that being "nice" to each other is rather nebulous. Ask different people and you'd get different answers.

Personally, I'd say that any kind of "nice" behaviour requires a good deal of social justice, precisely of the kind eschewed by leap. I think it is fair to say that you can hardly expect "good" behaviour if you entrench hierarchies or if deprivation is commonplace. No matter how hard you "educate" people.
 
 
Leap
10:22 / 28.04.03
Lurid –

Personally, I'd say that any kind of "nice" behaviour requires a good deal of social justice, precisely of the kind eschewed by leap. I think it is fair to say that you can hardly expect "good" behaviour if you entrench hierarchies or if deprivation is commonplace. No matter how hard you "educate" people.

I am all for social justice!!!!! It is just that my ideas of social justice include:-

i. The basic principle that those who can and do work do not owe a living to those who can but choose not to

ii. The basic principle that we do not as a rule require an elite to continually police us to make us sensible or moral, but that regular folks are capable of being charitable under their own guidance rather than have a state take taxes from them regardless of either that persons approval (which makes it theft) in order to enforce a system of charity (!) that is largely unconditional and which often runs contrary to the first principle mentioned above.

iii. The basic principle that you do not combat hierarchy and power-elites by creating a hierarchy and a power-elite (govt).

iv. The basic principle that says a life where privacy and direct personal involvement form a greater part of said life than do supervision and delegation/resignation, is a better life than one that runs contrary to such a basis.
 
 
Lurid Archive
10:29 / 28.04.03
Right. The point being that we disagree pretty fundamentally on what social justice means.
 
 
Leap
10:36 / 28.04.03
What, of what I just posted, do you disagree with, and why?
 
 
Ganesh
12:30 / 28.04.03
Well, Leap, it's largely phrased in 'who here likes laughter' stylee, soft-focus with edges (and all detail and definition) smoothed off. It's also rather heavy on emotionally-loaded wording ("power-elites" which "police" us via "theft" - versus "sensible" "regular folks" who value their "privacy") which would cause me to reject it on principle because its language makes me highly suspicious of (not-terribly-well) hidden bias.

I suppose the bit I have particular problems with is

...regular folks are capable of being charitable under their own guidance

partly because "regular folks" remains an entirely undefined, unknown quantity (which is not self-evident), and partly because being capable of something does not in any way indicate that one will actually do that thing. I maintain a strong belief - based, no doubt, on having worked with and alongside many of them/us - that the vulnerable within society (and, if necessary, I'll attempt a working definition of "vulnerable") deserve a certain minimal level of existence by virtue of our shared humanity. This, to me, is social justice.
 
 
Leap
12:49 / 28.04.03
Ganesh –

I maintain a strong belief - based, no doubt, on having worked with and alongside many of them/us - that the vulnerable within society (and, if necessary, I'll attempt a working definition of "vulnerable") deserve a certain minimal level of existence by virtue of our shared humanity. This, to me, is social justice.

Ah, so you are an Idealist who deals in universals (gotta save EVERYONE!) and I am a Pragmatist who deals in high probabilities (gotta save EVERYONE who can be saved without destroying the saving process itself!).

 
 
Lurid Archive
14:25 / 28.04.03
Since we have talked this to death, I doubt that you will suddenly understand why your particular slant on the world, full of its non sequiturs and unwillingness to address economic realities, isn't universally accepted. But I'll try.

i. The basic principle that those who can and do work do not owe a living to those who can but choose not to

As a founding principle for social justice, this tends to emphasise the rights of the wealthy over those of the poor. Without context and with complimentary statements about equality of oppurtunity, minimum standards of work and the role of socio-economic class it can only be seen as a call for social injustice, in my view. It asserts the right of the wealthy to dictate conditions of employment and oppurtunity.

As a "living" is more basic than health, education and legal protection it can also be seen as an assertion that what I consider to be Human rights are to be denied to those without wealth. Marie Antoinette would have approved of this declaration.

Inevitably it ensures that any difficulty of the separation of the poor into "worthy" and "unworthy" results in the retraction of a "living". Human mistakes, if they can assumed to be present in leap's utopia, result in death as a matter of course. Unjust, perhaps?

ii. The basic principle that we do not as a rule require an elite to continually police us to make us sensible or moral, but that regular folks are capable of being charitable under their own guidance rather than have a state take taxes from them regardless of either that persons approval (which makes it theft) in order to enforce a system of charity (!) that is largely unconditional and which often runs contrary to the first principle mentioned above.

I disagree over the choice of the word "elite". I do not consider a plumber to be an "elite" when I ask her to fix my pipes. Neither do I consider the police an "elite" when they direct traffic. Especially taken with (i), what this reinforces is the idea that any kind of rights are contigent on wealth on the approval of wealth. It essentially entrenches hierarchy as an inviolable entity. One can easily see this as a justification for a system of near slavery.

iii. The basic principle that you do not combat hierarchy and power-elites by creating a hierarchy and a power-elite (govt).

Is just false. Civil rights movements have campaigned for hard won governmental recognition to some success. Any real desire to combat "elites" practically requires some form of collective bargaining tool in order to have any chance of competing with entrenched power. Again, one can only really see this as a declaration that those with economic and political power not be interfered with. Also, the use of the word "elite" is pretty ideological as it ignores the role of democracy. The populace cannot express their will, only individuals can - real elites need not lose any sleep.

iv. The basic principle that says a life where privacy and direct personal involvement form a greater part of said life than do supervision and delegation/resignation, is a better life than one that runs contrary to such a basis.

I have little problem with this, except insofar as I know that leap refuses to use words like "privacy" and "supervision" in any widely accepted sense. Also, taken with what has gone before, it is clear that "supervision" is the interference of anyone with the natural order of wealth and "privacy" is the freedom to exercise one's power as one sees fit. This is again "justice" for the haves.



What should strike one on reading this declaration of principles for "social justice" is that there is no mention of society. Also absent are any notion of freedom of speech, freedom from discrimination, freedom of religion. Instead we have a set of principles that asserts the "freedom" from any obligation of others rights and the "liberty" to act as one pleases. Doubtless, leap will ask me whether people are "good" or "bad", whether I am an "optimist" or a "pessimist" and whether his declaration is one of "love" or "fear".

That isn't the point. The point is that leap's declaration attempts to describe an order where the only rights are the rights of the powerful. One can summarise this list of principles as saying that there should be no mechanism for challenging injustice.

It is a call for the abolition of justice.
 
 
Lurid Archive
14:29 / 28.04.03
Ah, so you are an Idealist who deals in universals (gotta save EVERYONE!) and I am a Pragmatist who deals in high probabilities (gotta save EVERYONE who can be saved without destroying the saving process itself!).

If by "save" you mean "feed", then the resources are available to do this many times over without significant hardship. The difference between yourself and Ganesh is that he is not obsessed with punishing some ad hoc collection of unworthies.
 
 
Ganesh
14:44 / 28.04.03
No, I don't try to "save" EVERYONE (whatever "save" - and, for that matter, "EVERYONE" - is supposed to mean) but, as I've said, I strongly believe that those vulnerable within our society are "worthy" of being afforded a certain, minimal 'safety net' (in terms of basic food, shelter, etc.) This is based, not on blind idealism, but on around ten years of actual practical experience working with these vulnerable individuals. When it comes to actually engaging with the practicalities of how humans are (as opposed to how I'd like them to be), I'd say I'm considerably nearer pragmatism than are you, Leap.
 
 
Quantum
14:47 / 28.04.03
I think if everyone was nice to each other everything would be fine
 
 
pomegranate
17:46 / 28.04.03
why don't we start here? and pass it forward, friends.
 
 
Ganesh
18:19 / 28.04.03
Good idea. As long as we don't have to be nice to the "slappers".
 
 
Ganesh
19:06 / 28.04.03
Or the "doley scroungers".
 
 
Leap
20:27 / 28.04.03
or indeed the fluffy liberal lefties who think the world should be covered in tax funded cotton wool..........

bless 'em
 
 
Ganesh
20:41 / 28.04.03
Or those who set up straw "liberal lefties", only to tear them to pieces with their "melee" weapons.
 
 
sobel
20:49 / 28.04.03
does anyone remember the 'get-along-gang'?
It was really my wee sister who watched it, lots of small woodland creatures gettin along i think
it was a bit shit really
 
 
Baz Auckland
23:04 / 28.04.03
my sister's dresser still has the stickers of Montgomery Moose and friends... a raccoon on roller skates?
 
 
Jack Denfeld
23:47 / 28.04.03
Why was this moved to conversation? I thought it could go into Headshop because I wanted to see if people thought everyone being nice could work in society.
 
 
Ganesh
23:57 / 28.04.03
Guess that's not how the thread turned out, Jack.
 
 
moriarty
02:14 / 29.04.03
What the hell is this all about? You kids are all messed up.

Olulabelle, I don't think people being nice to one another would wipe out all misery. Take having a crush on someone, for example. You tell the object of your desires you like them, they turn you down, nicely, it's still going to break your little heart. Then you go write a pop song about it. A relationship may break up on the nicest terms, but that doesn't make it less of a loss. And I'm sure the anguish of a loved one passing away wouldn't be tempered by niceness.
 
 
that
09:47 / 29.04.03
Which is what I was going to say...
 
 
C.Elseware
11:33 / 29.04.03
There is also an argument that being nice could cost us our "edge". That if we don't war and compete we will became decadent and decline and be surpassed by something younger and more aggressive.

I heard a good counter argument, which is that we should strive to be gentle and kind, like a master of martial arts. But is that possible for a population of order 10^9? All you can really do is be "nice" myself and hope that other people will work out that there's more to gain by being nice to me than nasty.

There was a mathematical game (can't remember the details, sorry) which showed that the best stragegy for co-operation was to be nice, unless someone was nasty to you last time in which case be nasty back ONCE then start being nice again.
 
 
Kit-Cat Club
11:59 / 29.04.03
Yes - see the thread in this forum on 'selfishness' for a brief account of it.

Surely the problem isn't individual niceness or otherwise so much as the systems in which we live? If I, personally, were to be horrible to you all it still wouldn't make a huge difference to your quality of life. Big-business-driven capitalism has inequality and aggression written into it (as does a lot of state theory, as elseware points out - this is made explicit in current 'neo-con' - radical right - thinking and is linked, now, to big business capitalism through the capitalist arms industry and privatisation of the military, etc.). Socialism is meant to avoid this institutionalisation of inequality, but unfortunately didn't manage it in practice.

I'm a bit dubious about this business of becoming decadent and declining as well - if only because, to me, it immediately says 'radical American right banging on about "Old Europe"' rather than 'objective view of the decline of civilisations'. It's also a bit too whiggish for my liking in terms of its conception of progress - and built upon the notion that there must be nation states and they must be inherently competitive, which is not necessarily the case...
 
 
gingerbop
16:51 / 29.04.03
If we take Barbelith to be a small sample of the world.. well everones pretty nice to each other in here. aahh, if only. I say, get rid of neds and save EVERYONE else.
 
 
Shrug
17:19 / 29.04.03
Well, is it possible? Answer, probably not. However I would like if people in general were more respectful of each other... there's just not enough respect these days damnit! (Or at least upfront about being bastard's).
 
  
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