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You want to believe? in what? the effectiveness of magic? that there is more to the world, to life, than we can immediately sense? Be very careful when asking people to tell you what to believe in or how to believe in it.
The best advice I could give about where to start, is... start with yourself. --to tell you the truth. clean your room. look very closely at things. listen carefully. start writing things down--things you think, things you see that affect you, and especially your dreams. just living is enough. you don't have to try very hard. that the desire is there means that something is ready to happen.
You don't necessarily need recommendations. I can't stress enough that you must trust yourself. The experiences and ideas you're looking for are, or will become, very personal. At that point, it is paramount that you are able to trust your inner voice. Begin that way, so that you don't have to unlearn things that you have used as a crutch to replace your own wise mind.
Cultivate self-awareness so that you are able to hear that inner guidance, that helper, that friend, and know the difference between that and those thoughts you think that would destroy you.
If it's reading you want... *I am forcibly holding myself back from throwing my favorite books at you*... go to the bookstore, or better yet, the library. browse the shelf. any shelf. read the titles, the backs of books. if you like it, if it interests you, then you have something to learn from it. don't worry that you might be tricking yourself. you're not. reread those books that you really really liked when you were a kid (or if you didn't read, do the things you used to enjoy, even if it's making mud pies or eating bugs).
it's funny that you're asking where to start. you're here, my friend. there is a library --in this forum-- of singular experiences and lessons learned. experiment. ask us questions. we will help you. |
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