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Right. In broad terms, I liked it, funny, especially Mawson's solution to the posession problem, his reaction to the parents afterwards and the whole thing between him and the demon. In specifics (and in no particular order (And I'm not a professional critic NDIPOOT)...
Edwardian you say? Apart from the 'dancing sambo' reference none of the humans particularly sounded like it. It takes a particular kind of narrator to pull off pop-culture references like to John Woo and here it just grated. I don't think 'The Exorcist' particularly needed to be mentioned either, references to vomit and Linda Blair would have been sufficient to clue in anyone with half a brain as to what was happening. The text at times comes off a little too arch and knowing, and the physical description of Mawson is too long and detailed, especially in phrases like angular and almost but not to narrow, His mouth was thin slash but somehow managed to avoid the cruelty that such thinness normally gives, quite the opposite.... I've made this mistake myself, trying to fit too much in to one place. Perhaps some of the description could be taken out here and moved to later on in the story (if you want to talk about his lips, how about when he's arguing with his Dad?). Mawson says "Er Hello" twice when he arrives.
How's that? |
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