The one real dream I had in my adult life was to have a meaningful, egalitarian and lasting love relationship with another human being. I've finally given up on that one, I'm now unconvinced that it was ever healthy to have that as my driving force, and I've already spent too long getting fucked over (but, you know, I'm only 22, I'm lucky to have realised it this early). I'm not bitter, and during this process I realised that I did have other dreams, ones that I thought had died with my childhood, and new ones that I am willing to try my hardest to realise. I have learned that it is possible to make dreams come true, especially if they're dreams that require hard work on one's own part. Eventually stuff does go your way at some point, but in the meantime, do what you can on your own behalf. I know it's difficult, but once you get into the habit of working at something, it gets a hell of a lot easier. I've also learned that sometimes not getting what you want is actually a good thing - it opens up opportunities you never thought you had.
I don't know how relevant all of that was, really...but I hope you feel more positive soon. Take care, man. |
