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Sausages

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21:11 / 13.02.03

I had £3 left to buy in the tea tonight and thought I would be reduced to beans, cheese and potatoes. But no! Beckoning me from the butcher's display were some lovely Lincolnshire sausages, full of organic pork that comes from happy pigs camping in those strange little pig tents you see from the train, and flavoured with sage. They kept their shape and didn't lose half their volume in water during the frying. Damn tasty too! REAL SAUSAGES!

Sorry veggie folks, if this description is too gruesome. Must say I have had some fine meatless ones here and there. The deli up the road in Edinburgh used to do a fine apricot and feta sausage, iirc.

But they always need to be charred on the outside.

The Return Of Rothkoid

21:42 / 13.02.03

Xoc: I hope you saved some to put in the fridge. You know that fridgey-cold cooked sausages are genius. Oho yes.

Not that I had any of those last night. Heavens, no.

22:00 / 13.02.03

But of course, you will have salsiccia, salami and pepperoni to feast on in Little Italy. Presuming that has all gone ahead OK, Ragazzo?

The Return Of Rothkoid

22:13 / 13.02.03

As of Sunday night, bella.

22:28 / 13.02.03

God, Sausages are the most underrated foodstuff ever. They're just wonderful. Pork and Leek are particular favourites, but god, there's so much you can do.

I've got sausage-making equipment at home. Am tempted to start experimenting.

A

03:22 / 14.02.03

I had vegetarian hot dogs for breakfast. I know that weiners made from soy and grains aren't really a proper substitute for minced up cow eyeballs and hog rectums, but they're pretty damn good nonetheless.

03:32 / 14.02.03

In my wretched experience, USAns don't have a clue about sausages. At least, not in the part of the USA where I currently reside. I haven't had a decent sausage in 3 years.

03:36 / 14.02.03

After watching a flatmate eat blood sausage every morning for a semester of school, I don't think I'll be having another sausage for quite some time.

09:34 / 14.02.03

You know what there should be, but isn't? A specialist Sausage and Beer emporium. Imagine going somewhere where you could sit down (or go to the bar) and choose:

a) A pint, from a selection of 100 or more

and

b) A cold sausage, from a selection of 100,000 or more

I'd like to see all the sausages arranged in a rack on the wall behind the bar, though I'm not sure it would be hygenic. You could do it with the cured and preserved ones, maybe just have wooden models for the ones that need cooking. The fact that a wooden model of a sausage is so easy to imagine tells me that this would be the right thing to do.

No doubt they've had this since the dark ages in Germany and Eastern Europe, I see no reason why it shouldn't succeed here.

09:58 / 14.02.03

Veggie sausages, mmmm. I love the Linda McCartney ones, rolls 'n' sausage with brown sauce.

And I've been intrigued ever since BiP talked about rolls with veg-sausage baked into the middle. Sounds good.

A friend came to my place for tea a couple of months ago with her boyfriend. I made a spicy bean and sausage casserole, which turned out rather yum, and at the end of the meal he turned to me and said "you know, that really wasn't as bad as I expected."

He meant it nicely, I'm sure.

This is making me hungry, so I'm off to find some lunch.

09:59 / 14.02.03

Have you ever been to Spain, Saveloy? In Madrid I saw a couple of places called Museo del Jamon, which means obviously enough, Museum of Ham. Only it's not like a museum 'cause you can eat their wares. In the centre there's an oval bar with people sitting around it buying drinks. And around the periphery of the room is a proper butcher's counter, with every kind of meat you never wanted to eat arrayed beneath the glass and the guy standing there in his apron. And photos above the bar of various combinations of what you can have, like they have in noodle bars.

So on a Saturday night you've got these elegant Spaniards in evening dress with an aperitif in one hand and in the other a bread roll with a baboon's arse cheek hanging out of it.

And then you look up. And you see the entire ceiling (yes the entire ceiling) filled with hanging legs of cured pork, hanging from the hoof, with litle plastic cocktail umbrellas stuck into the shoulder to catch the tepid fat as it drips. You can actually feel the fat in the atmosphere, condensing on your skin.

Not sure if that's what you had in mind ...

10:06 / 14.02.03

Linda McCartney's get another thumbs-up from me. Great for weekend breakfasts with toast and tinned spaghetti or baked beans. And for Sunday night bangers and mash. And the best thing is that they're vegan which a lot of veggie sausages aren't. And why the fuck is that? If they can do it without that tiny drop of egg, then why can't all the other brands? I've had other vegan ones while eating out which were delicious, but I haven't come across them in the shop. Mind you I haven't looked very hard. But that's not the point, and I'll thank you not to mention it.

10:22 / 14.02.03

Not to speak ill of a dead woman's sausages but Linda MCartney's weren't a patch on these. Don't see the feta /apricot one listed. Maybe I just dreamt them up. I often dream of food, right enough, fat bastard that I am. The curried parsnip and parmesan ones sound weird but are delicious.

Would love to have a House of Saveloy franchise round the corner. Imagine the smell of frying sausage and hops as you saunter in. Served with some powdery, fluffy, white mash.

The Germans make damn good sausages too, big boiled Bratwurst!

Unsure about this business of sausage casseroles though. I like crisp, charred sausage skin and when you cook them in liquid the skins become lambent and plasticised.

Best thing about sausages is they were invented to use up all the beast. If you're going to butcher a bouncy piglet, you should at least find a use for every little bit of his innards.

10:29 / 14.02.03

Ooh, those wicken fen sausages sound gorgeous. I want some right now. I'm sure they use up every last bit of the carrot, too.

10:29 / 14.02.03

Thanks for that link xoc. Those sausages sound ace. Will be trying them out very shortly.

10:30 / 14.02.03

mmmmm, stomach rumbling (and I've just eaten toasted crumpets with honey too, therapy for my everlasting flu you know...)

10:32 / 14.02.03

Loomis>

Cor! That sounds amazing. I'd love to experience it, though I think House of Saveloy (thanks Xoc) would be a much simpler affair. Perhaps the flagship branch could be based on that.

Xoc:
"If you're going to butcher a bouncy piglet, you should at least find a use for every little bit of his innards."

*sniff* Free with every sausage at HoS: aluminium tear catchers; little trays worn beneath the eyes, for sympathetic but weak-willed customers to weep into.

10:53 / 14.02.03

Xoc, I hear what you say about sausage casseroles vs crispy charred ones, but your local butcher, Hesters on Kennington Lane, does a lovely venison sausage, and Saint Delia has a recipe for venison sausages in a red wine and juniper berry sauce. Try that, it's absolutely wonderful with some mash, and I guarantee you won't miss your crispy skins. By the way, this thread's appearance is weird synchronicity; I had merguez sausages (spicy North African lamb sausages) for dinner 3 times this week, and today I took a Spanish print of a jamon serrano, without fat umbrella alas, to be framed.

11:52 / 14.02.03

mmmmm, mmmmerguez! Forgot about those.

Think I know the butcher's you mean, H.I.R. Vauxhall end of Kennington Lane? Magnificent window display, with all manner of flesh and poultry festooned therein. Can't say I've ever been too impressed with venison but don't think I've ever had it in sausage-form. Bambi bangers, yum! Did have venison en croûte in chocolate sauce once and it was damn fine, now I think of it.

On the subject of bouncy piglets btw, the pork farmed in Britain is amongst the best in the world, because of the relatively stringent animal welfare requirements (as compared to everywhere else) but Compassion in World Farming has been highlighting some abuse that persists, such as

11:53 / 14.02.03

the pigs are regularly left in suspense?

11:54 / 14.02.03

(bottom half of this post seemed to vanish into the ether there. Sorry)

such as tethering sows in stalls. Pigs are comparatively intelligent and highly social creatures (score more highly than innercircle, for instance, on both those axes) and intensive farming methods can have particularly cruel outcomes for them.

There was a change in EU regulations earlier in the year which insisted on pigs being supplied with toys to keep them stimulated and stop "tailbiting". All those happy little pigs with their Barbie and Ken dolls and their collections of Beanie Babies. Bless...

12:01 / 14.02.03

Are we meant to supply our own suggestions? I like this game!

... such as being forced to wear high heels even though it hurts their hooves?

12:03 / 14.02.03

Being forced to go on pro hunting marches to boost the numbers?

12:04 / 14.02.03

I think the pigs have hacked Xoc's PC

12:14 / 14.02.03

I sent a link to an article about that EC directive to my parents, Xoc. Apparently farmers face a maximum of 3 months prison if they don't put a toy in their pigs' sties. My parents have a lovely ginger Tamworth sow called Rosie who had 9 gorgeous little piglets a fortnight ago. Actually I'm starting to feel pretty damn ambivalent about this sausages thread.

Yep, that's the butchers. The window display is marvelous, but then again I am a man who puts pictures of cured meat on his walls.

12:16 / 14.02.03

And I agree from meeting parents' pig that they are intelligent animals - more so than others I could mention.

SWILL THIS THREAD!!!

12:18 / 14.02.03

I was going to comment on that, H.I.R. Do you have other foodstuffs? I may look for some lentil pictures, and maybe some dried apricots for my living room. Maybe i could do a collage? Though that might worsen my ant problems.

What sort of toys do pigs like?

12:20 / 14.02.03

Rosie has a burst football, and the piglets, well, you know how it is these days, it's all bloody computer games isn't it?

12:24 / 14.02.03

Get them books! Educate 'em while you entertain 'em, that's my motto!

12:26 / 14.02.03

Just don't give them any Orwell ...

And a burst football? Isn't that just like a slap in the face? That's torture really. How do we know poor Rosie isn't being taunted - "There's the pitch, why don't you go and play? We gave you a football!" I'm calling the EC right now ...

12:26 / 14.02.03

I need a better motto.

Edited to say... argh, I had this comedy notion about this sort of person who's snobbish about always buying books instead of toys for kids. Only this would be for pigs. But I couldn't get it to work.

In memoriam: a joke that never was.

12:42 / 14.02.03

WTF? Must remember never to used the accursed words *s*u*c*h and *a*s in a post again. Or maybe the Lord of the Pigs was punishing me for encouraging porking out on piglets.

One more shot at the porking link: Stall and Tether campaign If it doesn't appear this time around, I shall start tailbiting myself to relieve the frustration.

Well, I need a wee lie down now to recover from all that stress! That is why my lovely boss sent me home early from work, so I could lie in my nice warm bed, reading my book and coughing, listening to Radio 4, generally pigging out.

And this lucky pig appears to have a fully furnished apartment and a cuddly toy:

12:48 / 14.02.03

"Kill Xoc's link. Bash it in. Slit it's throat."

Yes, the burst football is pretty crap. I'll have a word.

13:13 / 14.02.03

From what I remember of a radio report featuring a rather engaging pig farmer talking about suitable toys, old tyres and footballs (which would inevitably be instantly burst) seemed to be the porkers' favourites, H.I.R. Rosie's probably happy as a pig in the proverbial shit.

13:15 / 14.02.03

But aren't footballs made of pigskin?!

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