Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
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I am an Introduction

Funktion

06:35 / 12.02.03

Why?

I don't really know.
Maybe I wanted to let you all know how happy I am to find Barbelith here after all...

Quotes of the Day:
"You must listen for the colour of the sky, look for the sound of the hummingbirds wing and search the air for the perfume of ice on a hot summer's day. When you have found these things, you will know. In response to the question 'How come you sense these things?' Simply answer, 'How come you do not?'"
-Ninja Tune

"the tide is turning...the enemy is suffering terrible losses..."
-Gen. G.A. Custer

Tezcatlipoca

08:55 / 12.02.03

I wanted to let you all know how happy I am to find Barbelith here after all...

And welcome, for you have indeed found the lost city of Barbelith, obscured in the mists of folklore, lost for countless centuries, where strange and primordial creatures rampage through the thick undergrowth of political freedoms.

And now my fellow 'lithers and I must initiate you, newcomer, and remember that your future happiness in our island paradise depends upon your answer...

Ninja or Pirate?

ONLY NICE THINGS

09:16 / 12.02.03

Dude!

Welcome to the board, Funktion (wasn't there a new members thread somewhere?). A couple of things you may find unfamilair because of Barbelith's non-UBB software.

Elsewhere you've used UBB code for bold. barbelith uses a limited amount of HTML code for emphasis and links: there's a guide here.

Also, Barbelith uses the topic summary or abstract functiom for searches. This is particularly useful when checking to see what discussion exists on a topic before starting a new one. It's less important in the Conversation, because threads are deleted (at least theoretically), but in essence the more detailed and relevant the topic summary is the more likely somebody looking for the topic under discussion will be able to find it. There's more on this here.

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

09:30 / 12.02.03

(rubs hands together)

Okay, so who's got the candles?

(continues to rub hands together, while considering therapy).

Hello, by the way.

10:44 / 12.02.03

Didn't we impose a three-month moratorium on arsecandling?

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

10:56 / 12.02.03

Ooooowwww! Three months?

Okay. Okay. Fair enough.

It's still my turn to shave the goat, though.

Quantum

10:58 / 12.02.03

Hello Funktion, I too only just stumbled across this lost civilisation of hyperintelligent alien monkeys but was too rude to introduce myself- I find it's best to mimic their strange ways and accept the arsecandling in good humour- they mean no harm.

Quantum

11:00 / 12.02.03

Oh, and sorry, NINJA! Hai! Pirates take it up the bum, beware my spinning wheels of steel! (also Ninjas have the best tunes)

11:13 / 12.02.03

...and you think there are no incidents of taking-it-up-the-bum among ninjas? Not even with those sexy, figure hugging outfits they wear? Many of history's greatest ninjas (and pirates) have been proud sodomites, my friend, and we here at Barbelith salute them.

Tezcatlipoca

13:07 / 12.02.03

and we here at Barbelith salute them

But very slowly. And only on alternate Saturdays.

grant

13:09 / 12.02.03

A "ninja sodomite salute" sounds like it could be a great technique.

Quantum

13:13 / 12.02.03

..or a great name for a ninjin' tune...

Mourne Kransky

13:35 / 12.02.03

Ah, but Ninja sodomy would be so unsatisfying: Sodomy by Stealth, quick in and out, undetected.

Come aboard the Black Pig, me hearties, where it's Rum, Sodomy and the Lash from dawn till Dusty. And singalongaPogues.

Mourne Kransky

14:08 / 12.02.03

And welcome Funktion, whichever is your lifestyle choice re grog-sodden gnarly pirates or tensile steely ninjas.

This could be a new INTRODUCTIONS THREAD if there were any other lurkers or newbies out there who wished to take this opportunity to de-cloak.

Don't worry about the ass-candling thing, we were just kidding. There never was a three month moratorium. Line up, bend ovah!

The Natural Way

16:23 / 12.02.03

Please to meet you.

Don't quote Coldcut samples at me, or I'll start on that terrible fucking election tune they did. And Yazz.

Ganesh

17:31 / 12.02.03

Tt. You'd think taking it up the bum were a bad thing...

Hello, Funktion, and welcome.

Funktion

00:20 / 13.02.03

Hahahahah
Thank you all for the welcome, code tips, comments on Coldcut tracks and of course your kind offers or arsecandling...

Ninja or Pirate ?

the former---> I am BlindNinjaStlye elsewhere

Char Aina

00:28 / 13.02.03

i have just realised that i dont know the allegiances of the board in terms of ninjas and pirates.

well, mostly.

so clizzickity clack, and we shall find out.

8===>Q: alyn

00:32 / 13.02.03

These old-timers, what chickenhawks they are, always swooping in on the newbies with their old guard Ninja/Pirate dichotomy. They forget the perfectly serviceable new-paradigm category of cowboy, also known for some excellent sodomy -- ah, sodomy, out on the open plain, under the stars, to the lowing of cattle in the deep prairie night. Welcome, y'all, gidderup. Yonder moon is a waxin' wide and them chaps yer wearin' is right pretty.

Careful, son. I'll let one of the others construe all this and give you examples and so on, if they so choose, but can you think of a spaceman, real or imaginary, who isn't at heart either a ninja, pirate or cowboy*?

Funktion

05:18 / 13.02.03

but can you think of a spaceman, real or imaginary, who isn't at heart either a ninja, pirate or cowboy*?

Certainly Alan Moore's Spaceman archetype from Miracleman is none of those three...

or all of those three...

or perhaps just varying percentages of those thre.e..

aus

05:28 / 13.02.03

But can you think of a cowboy, real or imaginary, who didn't at heart wish he was either a ninja or a pirate?

Yes, it's lonely out here on the plains with only a horse and hundreds of cows for company. Mmmmmmmmmmm... cows...

Nietzsch E. Coyote

05:42 / 13.02.03

So that is the difference Cowboys are the most solitary! Plus they live in tune with animals of a sort. Pirates are part of a group that act as a group, even thought they be indiviualized. Ninjas are part of a group that do solitary missions, even though they are a collective/clan. Coypokes are solitary and act solitary.

aus

05:57 / 13.02.03

Being with a horse and hundreds of cows isn't really solitary. But I am a solitary pirate, so piratical that even other pirates disdain me... or taste the steel of my cutlass! Arrrrrrrrr!

(Can someone make a topic abstract for this thread?)

Less searchable M0rd4nt

16:31 / 13.02.03

There's already a giant robot category. Don't push your luck.

Mourne Kransky

17:47 / 13.02.03

But the giant robots were built by and are in thrall to Mordant, the Ninja Queen, so they're really just a Ninja subset (the Ninjas who are not sufficiently fleet of foot and sleightofhandy).

They are no threat to brave pirates because they just rust up in the sea rime.

And the cowboys are just pirates who've lost their sea legs. They are our hard-drinkin', loose-livin', prairie-roamin' cousins.

8===>Q: alyn

19:21 / 13.02.03

What is this, the 17th Century? A cowboy is an evolution of both ninja and pirate -- the fruit of a happy marriage, if you will -- with the skill and dangerosity of a ninja and the drunken fury of a pirate, plus a little something I like to call insipid wisdom, which you can't beat with a katana or a cutlass.

Welcome to the 19th Century, Barbelith.

The Return Of Rothkoid

21:29 / 13.02.03

A cowboy's just a pirate who a) isn't good enough for a team of rogues or b) has hydrophobia. Pshaw.

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