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awww rage...
honestly, if everybarby was half as honest as you, and genuinely as willing to be challenged, corrected, advised and etc... the board'd be a better place.
i know what you mean about the not-knowing-if-i-actually-meant-that thing as well. happens to me all the time. i say awful things to people i like, i make jokes about things that aren't funny - sometimes i just plain don't make sense... i often don't know why i say the things i do.
but, y'know, you've gotta struggle against cliche - against all the empty gestures - especially bad this time of year, any sense real personal expression buried, become a formality, a ritual. i'm completely convinced that much of the best art being made right now kind of acknowledges this - it's not so much postmodern as brokendown and - fuck - disordered? sometimes the only way to express yrself is found in the absolute impossibility of articulating what you wanna say.
ranting now. 'lost myself on a tangent...'
but, yeah. take a deep breath. don't stress. you're as kool as a polar bear mainlining anti-freeze. have a good xmas and prepare to evolve even further in 2003. |
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