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Societal opt out.

pointless and uncalled for

14:09 / 15.12.02

I hate this time of year. Not the winter season but the fucking christmas season. I know this is on a personal level but it just gets worse and worse every year. I continually have to put up with nauseating, insipid crap and bizarre social pressures that make the misogynistical methods of certain undeveloped countries seem quite liberal. Add to this the continual familiar hectoring about my continued lack of relationships and less than spectacular employment history and it get unbearable and this is just the tip of the iceberg.

I'll save you the pity me story but if there is one single societal construct that I would like to opt out of and not have to consider/dread anymore then christmas has got to be the one.

14:23 / 15.12.02

So opt out! I spent many Christmases at home, alone, while flat/house mates all went to their families. I looked after cats, the home, and myself. Christmas day was spent cycling around the city of London or going to the local park for coffee. They were good times. You could perhaps negotiate with family to see them around the festive season, as opposed to being there on Christmas/Boxing day.

Once you've made the break, it will be easier to tell your family that you want to do something different.

14:25 / 15.12.02

Christmas I can handle. Baby Showers freak me out. I've only ever been to one, but I kinda don't ever want to go to one again. I mean, I guess it's nay so much greed driven, since one does need a crap load of stuff to take care of a baby, but here's the thing: It's frequently an all-female occasion, and events deliberately divided by gender kinda give me a wiggins. Then it all revolves around this one pregnant woman who sits in front of everyone and has to open presents and ooh and ahh over all of them, and the crowd has to make happy comments on, like, every gift. Not to mention the fact that the unborn kid will occasionally kick its mother in the stomach while all this is going on. It's really scary.

Matthew Fluxington

14:34 / 15.12.02

Yeah, Potus - you are an adult. You don't have to go back to do something you hate, and you shouldn't. This recent Dan Savage column makes a good point about this sort of thing.

15:13 / 15.12.02

Yeah, Xmas, and most other state-sanctioned Holy Days, for that matter, piss me off. Yes, it would be fucking wonderful if there were some sort of way to selectively block out the flashing red and green lights, the insipid music, the shopping frenzy, etc. If there were, however, that would probably be the first step in selling silence, though.

"Oh, so you don't like the barrage of adverts, noise, and everything screaming out from every flat surface? Well, if you could afford these goggles from SpumCo, you'd be just fine..."

But I'm digressing.

I don't like baby showers either. Or bachelor parties/bachelorette parties, and the trappings thereof. I don't much like state-sanctioned marriages, nor do I like that only a few people can reap the benefits of said societally-approved marriages.

Racism, sexism, homophobia. I don't like that there's a million subtle and not-so-subtle ways that these things are promoted, and that even the best-intentioned people end up absorbing them.

I'd love to be able to opt out of the farcical idea that I'm only worth something to my society if I make a certain amount of money in a certain profession.

I'm meandering. I'll shut up, now.

::a::

15:29 / 15.12.02

I love Christmas. I know it's not fashionable to admit it, but I do. I love the atmosphere provided by tasteful Christmas lights, I love Christmas trees. I love the excuse to buy/make perfect presents for those I love - I love the challenge of finding things that people will really like, I love paying attention throughout the year, latching onto little wistful comments and making small wishes come true, and I love pleasantly surprising people. I love the opportunity to bake fantastic luxury Christmas cake. I love the fact that Eddie Izzard's got a new video out in time for Christmas. Admittedly, it's the run-up to Christmas that I really like, and Christmas morning - Christmas afternoon/evening are much like any other day, with a slight post-festivity depression. I live with my family at present, but I opted out of visiting other relatives years ago, staying home alone to mind the dogs instead. I don't buy into the idea that I have to be a performing Jack Russell for relatives, and my family have accepted that. I reckon you should do what makes you happy - might take people a while to get used to it, but there's not usually any good reason to put yourself through something that makes you miserable...

15:44 / 15.12.02

I don't mind Christmas too much, personally, apart from the intensification of consumer bullshit. But then I make a point of only spending a couple of days in the company of my family, we spend most of that time reading the books we got as presents, drinking and sleeping, and if I'm bored with their company I go out to the pub.

This year I won't be seeing any of my family at all, though I'll be spending it with someone else's family - I don't know how that will work out, but they've been okay so far.

Christmas is also the season of workplace idleness, since half the people are on holiday and the other half don't feel like doing any work. And daily after-work drinks and meals, if you're lucky enough to be working near anyone you actually know. I dimly remember this.

20:26 / 15.12.02

I want to buy an illuminated reindeer silhouette for my front window. This will be a signal to the rest of the world that the DSS has finally posted the Giro I've been owed since October, and that I've actually received it. Otherwise, there will be no Christmas festivities in this house.

Tryphena Absent

13:37 / 16.12.02

This year Christmas has proved itself OK, probably something to do with me decorating the tree totally haphazardly instead of my mother-the-perfectionist doing it. We have no family coming here and that means no one will question me when I walk out of the house for an hour on Christmas Day to escape the insanity of my parents trying to remain calm while cooking the dinner. It's also totally tacky and that's so good.

I've always loved weddings but I think I'm about to start hating them, my relations have sent me an invitation that says '... and partner'. It dawns on me that this is now going to happen forever and that when I'm thirty-five and unmarried (marriage is an outdated institution when you don't consider tax evasion)even if I have a partner they'll be asking when the wedding is. How completely foul.

17:52 / 16.12.02

fridge, you ass - my family is more than merely ok. what other family do you know would follow up the famous thanksgiving discussion of orgies with gramma and great gramma with a christmas party "reasonable expectation of presidential dick sucking privileges" complete with accompanying facial expressions for full comedic effect?

and all this without the typical family bickering (other than the play type that culminates in an ill-advised after dinner wrestling match, which I always and without fail win, albeit a little green in da gills). my family kicks ass