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Apparently God designed man in his own image. Well, he had no business to do so. I can think of several ways the design could have been improved upon with a little bit of forethought. It's not like he was in a rush that day, surely. I mean, he had already fashioned all the animals and idled millennia away just moving upon the face of the deep.
These thoughts were stimulated by MisGuided Lady of the Flowers, in another thread, making me think of having nipples added to my penis. I would like to try these modifications too:
* swivel eyes like a chameleon, attractively balanced above ears on either side of the head, so I would miss absolutely nothing.
* handy extra arms, like Ganesh, that would fold neatly away when not required. Would be very popular at the imminently lamented Fist.
* would also like Ganesh' trunk, so the nose could be much more useful. Could eat your dinner whilst reading or typing or scratching an itch. Could smell trouble coming around corners.
* earlids, so you could shut your ears as easily as your eyes and avoid unwanted noise.
* it would also be nice if your penis got bigger with exercise, like all the other muscles.
* and, back to the chameleon, I want skin that changes colour according to my environment, my mood and all the while under my conscious control. I could be blue like a Bolian or attractively swarthy without risking skin cancer. |
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