Subcultural engagement for the 21st Century...
Barbelith is a new kind of community (find out more)...
You can login or register.

Underground > Creation >

What not to eat

Tryphena Absent

11:18 / 13.12.02

Two days ago my housemate, I shall now refer to her as KT, stood in the kitchen and spooned cold sweetcorn from an extra value tin in to her mouth. It made me gag. Up to the age of fifteen I could not, would not, eat those weird yellow pieces of crunchy food. Haunting my life the smell would fill the room embracing me with a feeling of imminent dread, projectile vomiting bound to begin in five seconds, I ran out of the room and would only enter with my jumper covering my nose.

I do not eat sweetcorn.

gridley

15:52 / 13.12.02

My friend Alex got really high by himself one night in his early twenties, got quite hungry, but unfortunately had no money and very little food in the house. He did have onions, peppers, and rice though....

and a roommate who's dog had just died. No no no! He did NOT eat the dog. He did however fry up a can of dog food with the peppers and onions and threw in the rice. Unfortunately, something in the dog food (probably the preservatives) made a nasty odor when he cooked it, and he couldn't bring himself to eat any.

Then, his roommate showed up, drunk and starving. He asked Alex if he could have some of his food. Alex (not wanting to admit what he'd considered doing) said no. His roommate accused him of being a cheap greedy bastard, so Alex gave in. The poor guy ate most of it and loved it. Although he did complain of stomach pains for days later.

Mourne Kransky

19:36 / 13.12.02

Eating people is wrong. Eating dogs and horses is often wrong.

Eating Latin American food is almost always wrong, morally (guinea pigs) and gustatorily (refried beans, plantain).

Kaffir lime leaves are illegal in this country or so I heard today on The Vegetable Show on Radio 4.

Raw tomatoes are evil and should have been prohibited in Leviticus, instead of lovely, lovely shellfish.

Celery serves no purpose, none that I can determine. More of a packing material than a foodstuff. Like munching a rug.

I once ate a MacDonalds and would not, willingly, repeat the experience.

I love fish but there are some times when it turns out to be treacherously bony creature. Never eat a pike.

Sushi takes a bit of headwork before I can get excited by it and never eat fugu without a certificate. I saw this Quincy once...

Lastly, in my taboo foods list, there's the polar bear's liver thing. It'll kill ya.

gridley

19:52 / 13.12.02

Raw tomatoes evil? Speak move of this aversion, dear Zocher. Would you, for instance, not partake of a lovely cool tomato, basil, and mozzarela salad?

STOATIE LIEKS CHOCOLATE MILK

20:37 / 13.12.02

Celery's kind of essential in all manner of soups. Totally pointless otherwise.

Is this really a Creation thread? I think, sans recipes, probably not.

Tryphena Absent

21:48 / 13.12.02

You're meant to be interesting about why you don't eat things people. Interesting. A recipe of what you don't eat, why you don't eat it, where the hell is your deep seated psychological angst about sweetcorn, leeks, marshmallows? Huh? I'm just not feeling it.

Tryphena Absent

21:52 / 13.12.02

People eat meringue, some people eat it soft, texture like gooey brains under your teeth. Others eat meringue hard, fake ice cracks, pure sugar absorbed by your poor ill gums. Some people add pieces of fruit in some strange culturally induced attempt to make an evil food healthy. A strawberry here, a blackcurrant there, adding to the vile texture of the foodstuff. Insane.

Less searchable M0rd4nt

23:39 / 13.12.02

The luminous violet fungus known as August's Joy is supposed by some to be a delicacy. They extol its melting texture, its fine ( almost ethereal) flavour, and its mildly hallucinogenic properties (it produces short but poingant episodes of deja vu in suceptible individuals). Others feel that anything that still glows after being fried with garlic for ten minutes is untrustworthy.

bio k9

06:58 / 14.12.02

Celery's kind of essential in all manner of soups. Totally pointless otherwise.

I always thought it was created to hold peanut butter.

Mourne Kransky

10:21 / 14.12.02

I would partake of a lovely cool basil and mozzarella salad but, if there were raw tomatoes on the plate with it, I would throw up. Strangely, the offensive taste and texture is generally banished by even the tiniest bit of cooking. Soon as ythey're heated, they are transformed into an accept

Mourne Kransky

10:26 / 14.12.02

(excuse the premature posting, tricky this laptop, no mouse)

...they are transformed into an acceptable foodstuff. Quite enjoyable too but still not a great fan. Pretty much indispensible to Italian cuisine.

dj kali_ma

00:24 / 15.12.02

I occasionally get a strange craving for vienna sausages. And kippers.

I feel horrible shame afterwards though, so it's okay.

And the resultant dreams are always entertaining.

::a::

Tryphena Absent

00:54 / 15.12.02

Cod, the most boring fish on the planet, also slowly floating in to extincto land (where all extinct things live). It's white and it tastes like it. In fact so boring that I don't wish to be bored by whining about it.

Mourne Kransky

10:08 / 15.12.02

I find unadulterated cod, briefly cooked, quite enjoyable but saltcod is best avoided. Never had it till I came to London.

There's an odd but intriguing book I recently read called Cod: A biography of the fish that changed the world by Mark Kurlansky (also the author of Salt: A world history). It increased my respect for the beleaguered cod.

Our Lady of The Two Towers

11:21 / 16.12.02

I don't like melon, not sure why, as far as I'm aware I was not menaced when I was young by a kiddy-fiddler dressed as a melon, so I have no basis for this deep seated dislike.

Sweetcorn, not particularly enamored with it, but will eat in small amounts, with a nice bit of 'Weekend Chicken' perhaps...

The Natural Way

12:39 / 16.12.02

Now I know we're all agreed that toasted shitty white bread and black olive pate (which I prefer to pronounce "PAIT") do not mix. Oh, we're not? Right, well that'll be because none of you have given this'n a crack at 7:00 in the morning on a fierce whizz comedown. Oh no. But I have. And there was "mmmMMmm, delicious Pate"ing, and then there was retching and puking.

And then there's liver: always liver. So special. That exquisitely disgusting pencil-eraser texture - all spongy on the ouside, crumbly and powdery on the inside - and that TASTE! Aaah.....Iron-y goodness. Retching and puking.

But I love liver Pate (remember: pronounced "PATE")

Palm Violets: these are not okay and taste of soap and do not a delicious pate make. They are not sweets for kids. "Thanks Nan...." ...retching and puking.

Ariadne

12:57 / 16.12.02

Mandarin oranges in tins.

When I were a lass, my Mum somehow acquired a massive shipment (well, a big box) of tinned mandarin oranges. And so we had mandarin oranges every night for what felt like a decade. And now I can't bear the damn things.

Raw tomatoes, on the other hand, are my staple diet. I have them on toast for breakfast, have tomato salads for lunch, even eat them like apples as I potter around the house. Yummmy.

Tryphena Absent

14:18 / 16.12.02

Pear Drops, make my throat close up, they taste like they have a few too many chemicals added to them, their colour demonstrates that all too well. I have a spray to protect my shoes that smells identical to the things and that makes me choke just like the sweet does. At the age of thirteen I ate my first Pear Drop at school. It was the end of term, oh that fateful day, the form tutor handing out sweets to everyone in the class and the wild rain beating against the plastic coated glass of the language block. Richard spat his sweet out, it hit the blackboard, he got a detention for the following term. Argument ensued as he tried to claim it was against the rules and I sat with my friends at the back rueing the day I was fool enough to eat a Pear Drop. I coughed, I spluttered, I wished I had the guts to spit out my sweet but I kept it in my mouth with my throat tickling away.

gridley

14:50 / 16.12.02

damn, after really, really trying to come up with some kind of food that I won't eat, I really can't think of anything. Maybe that's why I'm fat....

Axel Lambert

16:32 / 16.12.02

Celery is essential in a decent Bloody mary.

Add Your Reply